| |
|
| |
My Younger Days
Joseph Hardy Neesima
(August 29, 1885)
CONTENTS
FOREWORD . . . . . . .
Birth and Name . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
Babyhood . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15
Death of Grandmother . . . . . . . . . . 16
Home-Education . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18
Wounded while Flying a Kite . . . . . . 20
Training in Etiquette. . . . . . . . . . 21
Favorite of a Clan Elder . . . . . . . . 22
Commodore Perry's Visit . . . . . . . . 25
Prince Itakura . . . . . . . . . . . . 27
Studying Dutch . . . . . . . . . . . . 29
Attending the Prince . . . . . . . . . 31
Formidable Dutch Warships . . . . . . . 35
First Voyage on a Steamer . . . . . . . 37
Finding the Heavenly Father . . . . . . 38
Changing of Thought, Making of Decision 40
Planning to Visit Hakodate . . . . . . 41
A Farewell Dinner . . . . . . . . . . . 43
Pere Nicholi . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44
Planning Flight from Japan . . . . . . 46
Boarding the Berlin at Risk of Life . . 48
Shanghai Bound . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51
Terribly Enraged. . . . . . . . . . . . 52
0n Board the Wild Rover, Off for Boston 54
13 MY YOUNGER DAYS
Birth and Name
I was born in a family which served a
prince of Japan, who had his palace in the
city of Yedo (called Tokyo,
the eastern capital, since 1868), within
a short distance of the Shogun's castle, and
his possession of land in a province of Kodzuke,
the castle town of which is called Annaka, and
is situated on one of the two roads directly
extending from Yedo to Kyoto. It is a humble
town having a population not exceeding four
thousand, and lies seventy miles nearly north
of the capital. His palace at Yedo was sur-
rounded by the extensive houses of his retainers,
which exactly formed a square inclosure.
I was born within this inclosure on the 14th
of January, in the year of 1843.1 Previous to my
birth four girls were born. So I was the first
l) old Japanese style. According to the present mode of
reckoning, February 12, 1843 (Tempo 14).
MY YOUNGER DAYS 14
son in the family. In those days, when the
feudal system was still in full sway, boys were
much preferred to girls in those families which are
entitled to wear two swords as a mark of the
rank called Samurai by the native tongue; for
there must be a male heir to the family in order
to perpetuate its rank and allowance in case of
the father's death. For that reason my birth
caused great joy to the family, and particularly
to my grandfather. When he heard a boy was
born he exclaimed Shimeta! which is a most
joyous exclamatory phrase often used by our
people when they come to realize some long
cherished hopes or wishes.
Just about that time it was a part of our
New Year days, as our old lunar month came a
month later than our solar year. It was then a
high time with us. Every house was decorated
by some complicated fantastic ornaments called
Shime. At the day dawn, just before the orna-
ments were removed from the house, a male babe
was introduced into the family. On account of
the Shime, a good omen, I was doubtless named
after it, and was called Shimeta, a man of the
Shime. But a story went round among our
15 MY YOUNGER DAYS
neighbors that I was named after my grand-
father's exclamation Shimeta! when I was born.
It may have a double meaning. At any rate I
was called Shimeta, and it was written after the
family name Neesima, according to our usage.
Of course I have no knowledge of the events
that happened in my home during my babyhood.
Babyhood
But, so far as I recollect, I was a
pet child of the family, especially of my
grandfather. I was chiefly brought up on his lap.
l have, also, some faint recollection of being
carried occasionally by my grandmother. I was
often taken out of doors on my sisters' backs,
when my mother busied herself at home with
sewing and mendings.
At my fourth year my brother was born. I
can well remember how happy I was with that
occasion. I also remember what a tiny babe he
was, and I thought how nice it would be when
he grew a little larger and I might spin a top or
fly a kite for him.
At my fifth year I was taken to the temple
of a god, who was supposed to be my life guardi-
an, to offer to him the thanks of the family for
his protection over me. It was a most joyous
MY YOUNGER DAYS l6
occasion to the family. My father bought for
me two little swords to wear then. A nice suit
of silk dressing was also made for me to wear
on that occasion. I was accompanied by my
parents and grandparents to present myself at
the temple. When we came home I was loaded
with candies, little kites, tops, and all sorts of
playthings.
Death of Grandmother
I remember quite well what impressive
thing the death of a person was when my
grandmother departed to the world
beyond. She was a woman of an
amiable disposition, and used to give much alms to
the poor in her latter life. She was often told by
some Buddhist priests that her future abode should
be the happy Nirvana, on account of her constant
almsgiving. I recollect very well what she said
at her death-bed: 'O, I am going! O, I am
going!' I supposed then that she was intending
to go to the happy Nirvana, to be received into
the bosom of the merciful Buddha. I also re-
member what confusion took place in my home
at her funeral, how our neighbors came to our
house, how they tried to console the bereaved
family, and how generously my grandfather
17 MY YOUNGER DAYS
provided for them many kinds of sweetmeats,
rice, sake, etc. I was then six years old. When
her funeral took place I followed in the proces-
sion partly walking and partly being carried on
a man's baqk. We started from home early in
the morning on account of the distance of the
temple, in the yard of which she was to be
buried with her ancestors. We were all received
in the large hall of the temple, where numbers
of the priests appeared in purple, red, and black
robes making a solemn ceremony by beating
drums, striking cymbals, and repeating some
sacred writings of Buddha.
While I was quite young my father used to
take me out to temples of the different gods to
worship, as certain days of the months or years
are especially devoted to them. On those occa-
sions the temple grounds were generally crowded
by all sorts of peddlers, selling pictures, kites,
tops, divers kinds of playthings, cakes, candies,
fruits, flowers, shrubs, etc.
I must not forget to mention here what
devoted pagan worshipers my father and grand-
father were. They never missed going to the
temples to worship on special days, and also kept
18 MY YOUNGER DAYS
numerous gods at home. A dozen of them were
kept in the sitting-room, a dozen more in the
parlor, with the tablets of their ancestors, and at
least a half dozen in the kitchen. They offered
them tea and rice in the morning and lights in
the evening. At each offering they made the
most profound bows before them, and made some
prayers in behalf of the family. So far as I can
recollect, they must have been thoroughly con-
vinced that the life and prosperity of the family
were depending on them. Being quite young and
thoughtless, I supposed that my grandfather and
father were the best people that ever lived in the
world. Of course, I followed their example set
before me, and often bowed myself down before
these dumb idols, having some childish ambition
that I might acquire some wisdom and skill to
become an accomplished samurai.
Home Education
As my father was a teacher of penmanship,
he was especially devoted to a god of penmanship
and learning, and went to his temple
and prayed to him that his son
might become skillful in penmanship. I knew
most too well how desirous he was that I should
become his successor and helper in teaching. I
MY YOUNGER DAYS 19
really disliked to devote myself to that tedious
business, but I was compelled by him to spend
half a day throughout years of my younger days
in writing those perpendicular characters over
and over after the copies carefully written by him.
With regard to the home-education I received
in my younger days, I might here narrate one
instance. One day I was naughty and refused
to make an errand for my mother, and when she
gave me a scolding I returned her an improper
word. My grandfather heard it, came directly
after me and caught me without saying a word,
rolled me up in a night coverlet, and shut me
up in a closet. After an hour's confinement I
was released from the punishment, which was, I
believe, the first one I ever received from my
grandfather. I thought then he was too severe
for a trifling offense, and went to a corner of
the parlor to weep. After a while he came to
me and urged me gently that I must no longer
weep. Then he told me a story of the bamboo-
shoot, in a most tender and affectionate manner
I ever heard before. It was told in a native
poeml which means as follows: " If I do not
l) 悪んでは打たぬものなり笹の雪
MY YOUNGER DAYS
care for it, I would never use my rod for shaking
the snow off from the down-bent branch of a
young bamboo-shoot." Then he asked, "Do you
understand its meaning, my dear?" and explained
its meaning himself. "You are young yet, and
just as tender as a bamboo-shoot. If your evil
inclinations spoil you, as a slight pressure of
snow might easily break down the tender shoot,
how sad I should be, my dear. Do you suppose
I am unkind to you by thus punishing you?" I
remained speechless then, but I understood full
well what he meant, and what kind intention he
had for correcting me. I was really ashamed of
my naughtiness, and thought that my grandfather
was very kind in thus punishing me. I believe
this talk made a deep impression on my young
mind, and helped me to behave much better
than before.
Wounded While Playing
However, I was just gay and playful as other
boys were. I was very fond of spinning tops,
rolling hoops, and flying kites.
I was especially fond of the
latter play, and when I went out to fly my
kite often forgot to come home at the regular
mealtime, which troubled my mother exceedingly.
MY YOUNGER DAYS 21
On that account my father refused to buy any
more kites for me; so I secured everything
necessary for making one without his knowledge,
and made a first-rate one myself. How gay I
was then I can hardly describe, when I saw it
going straight up toward the blue sky. I was
also very fond of running and jumping. A scar
on my left temple is a reminder of an accidental
fall which was a great humiliation to me, and
confined me at home nearly two months.
Since then I gave up those boyish rough
plays, and became fond of staying at home, either
for studying or writing. I took also some draw-
ing lessons from our neighbor, and drew birds,
flowers, trees, and mountains, after the regular
Japanese style, without a perspective. I was just
over nine years old then.
Training in Etiquette
Being the heir to the family, I was specially
warned by my mother to make most profound
bows to those higher officers em-
ployed by my prince. It was her
ambition that through their favor I might be pro-
moted to a rank much higher than my father's.
But I did not pay any attention to such a matter,
as some young fellows of our neighbors did,--that
MY YOUNGER DAYS 22
is, to be very polite in bowing, and expert in
using flattering terms. My boyishness disliked it.
Furthermore I was very shy, and had some slight
impediment in my speech. I could hardly speak
distinctly when I was obliged to converse with
strangers. Sometimes I refused to speak even to
our neighbors. It caused a great anxiety to my
mother. Either through her influence or my
father's decision, I was sent to a school of
etiquette, to learn to make the most profound
bows, most graceful manners and movements,
etc., in a company of noblemen, and to acquire
also the polite style of conversational phrases.
My teacher seemed to me a man of real genius.
He told me many interesting stories, and in-
vited me to come to him as often as I could. I
believe I spent more than a year in acquiring the
old-fashioned politeness, although I was not aware
at the time of its benefit.
A Favorite of Clan Elder
All the events of my younger life took place
within the square inclosure belonging to my prince.
It was a mere little spot, but
to me it was no small world.
Whatsoever events took place, or whatsoever
gossip was circulated, all seemed to my boyish
23 MY YOUNGER DAYS
mind no small affair. And above all, the prince
seemed a regular terror to us. He could either
behead us or expel us at his own pleasure, as
disgraced servants. Any little favor conferred
upon us from him was considered by us a great
luck. So everybody belonging to him desired to
secure his favor through his elder men, who were
really the governors of his whole estate. My
father used to take me to one of these elder men
while I was quite young; afterward I went to
his house alone, without being accompanied by
my father, because I was invited by him to come
there as often as I would. As he was childless,
he was always delighted to have me come and
play with him when he had nothing in parti-
cular to do. Staying there towards evening, I often
slept on his lap and was carried home in his
arms. When I began to draw some pictures, I
used to take them to show to him, and he was
really delighted to see the progress I made. He
often invited me to come to his house when he
had company. As I had acquired some manner
of politeness at the school of etiquette, especially
in the cup-bearing and waiting upon gentlemen
at their meals or banquets, I was quite service-
MY YOUNGER DAYS 24
able to him on such occasions. He often took
me with him when he went out to worship his
ancestors or his guardian gods. I was really
attached to him, because he loved me as if I
were his own son. He was a good horseman and
expert in shooting arrows. Moreover, he was a
man of some character. He often rebuked his
prince for his extreme arbitrariness, and also for
his excessive drinking. So the prince felt
uncomfortable to keep him near him, and sent
him off to his castle town Annaka to represent
him to the people, although it was called by the
prince a promotion. What a painful day it was
for me when he was ready to leave Yedo for
Annaka! I went as far as an outskirt of that
immense city, with my father and many others,
to see him off. I wept bitterly when I took my
last farewell. He was somewhat affected, but
manfully concealed it and showed me an affec-
tionate and touching smile. His last word to me
was, "Goodby, Shimeta; be a good boy. When
you grow up larger, come up to Annaka to see
me." Then he bade his attending servants to
start for the journey. He was then carried away
on a kago [palanquin], being followed by many
My YOUNGER DAYS 25
attendants, and I came home with my father
dreadfully tired and disappointed. This was one
of the great events that happened to me within
the first decade of my life. The marriages of my
two elder sisters took place within this decade.
Commodore Perry's Visit
Just about this time the country was in a most
painful condition. The people were accustomed
to peace under the reign of the
Tokugawa family, nearly three
centuries. Their laws were rigid and fixed.
Their executive officers were extremely suspicious
and fearfully oppressive. The ambition of the
people was completely crushed down. Many Perry's visit
samurai had almost forgotten how to use their
swords. Coats of mail were stored in ware-
houses merely as curiosities, and were useless
from decay. In fact the people had become
cowardly, corrupt, and effeminate. Licentious-
ness prevailed almost universally throughout the
country. Truly some reformation was needed.
A few far-sighted patriots lamented over this sad
state, and cherished some hope for a regular
renovation. But it was almost beyond their
expectations to see it. Just about that time
[1853] the famous American fleet commanded by
26 MY YOUNGER DAYS
Commodore Perry made a sudden appearance in
our waters. It caused an awful commotion in
the country. The people were frightened by the
terrible sound of the American cannon. However,
most of the leading princes of the country raised
a most impatient war-cry against the Americans,
and urged the government of the Shogun to expel
them from our waters at once. But we had no
forts, no war-ships, no cannons, no trained army
to fight with. The Shogun's chief counselors
were quick enough to see how useless it would
be to attempt to expel the Americans from our
waters. They knew also that the motive of the
Americans was entirely peaceful, and agreed with
them to open a few ports for commerce. This
very treaty with the Americans was soon followed
by treaties with some European powers. But the
action of the Shogun's counselors offended these
impetuous princes. All sorts of charges were
brought upon his government. He was called by
them a coward, a slave to the foreign barbarians,
etc. The party spirit was soon kindled. The
leading princes of Kyushu and Shikoku islands
leagued together and rose up against him. They
sent out a number of their spirited young
MY YOUNGER DAYS 27
samurai all over the country to stir up the hatred
of the people against the misgovernment of the
Shogun, and also against the foreign nations.
The cry to restore the imperial reign and expel
the foreign barbarians then became almost uni-
versal. It was indeed the starting-point of our
late revolution, which happi1y resulted in the
restoration of the imperial reign, and also in the
freer opening of the foreign intercourse, instead
of expelling foreigners from our shores.
Prince Itakura
I must not forget to mention something of
my prince in connection with this extraordinary
period of our national history. He was
quite accomplished in Chinese classics,
and was well known in the country as the
finest scholar among the princes. He was
a man of far sight, and quite fixed in his
purpose. About five or six years before the
American fleet appeared in our waters, this
prince, who spent most of his time in his own
secluded palace, perceived that the military sys-
tem of the country must be improved, and the
people must be better educated and well in-
formed. He selected a few promising young men
out of his own retainers and sent them to a
28 MY YOUNGER DAYS
military school just established under the auspices
of the Shogun's government. He gave out an
order to his retainers and compelled every one of
them, except some aged ones, to take lessons in
sword-fencing and horseback riding. Further-
more, he established a Chinese school and made
education compulsory to his younger subjects.
As he was subject to excessive drinking, and
was very fond of giving costly gifts to his
favorite friends and subjects in his younger days.
he found his treasury almost empty when he came
to equip his retainers with foreign arms. There
was no other way for him to procure money
than to impose an extra duty on the farmers
and merchants living in his dominions, for pur-
chasing cannon and muskets of the European
model, just introduced to the country by the
Hollanders. He confiscated all the bronze bells
from the Buddhist temples found in his dominion.
and cast a number of the field-pieces and mortars
out of them. By making such an extraordinary
effort he was enabled to provide a sufficient
number of cannon and muskets of the new model
for the use of all his retainers. Accepting the
order of the prince, I began to go to riding and
29 MY YOUNGER DAYS
fencing schools at the eleventh year of my age.
I did not enjoy the horseback riding so much as
I did the sword-exercise. Horses were not well
trained; some of them were just ugly as can be,
and I was often carried on their backs instead
of riding upon them.
Studying Dutch
At the age of fourteen I gave up these
exercises and devoted myself closely to the study
of the Chinese classics. Just about this
time my prince invited a native scholar
[Dr. Sugita], who was well versed in Dutch, to his
court, to teach his subjects that strange language.
He selected only three youths out of his subjects
to take lessons from him. I was one of the three
chosen by him and the youngest of all. I studied
Dutch with him nearly one year. His scholarship
was soon made known to the Shogun's govern-
ment, and he was appointed to go to Nagasaki
to receive instruction from the Hollanders in
engineering and navigation. After he went away
I gradually lost my interest in studying Dutch,
and suspended it temporarily. In the meanwhile
I made considerable progress in Chinese. On
that account, as a special favor. I was promoted
by my prince to be an assistant teacher in his
30 MY YOUNGER DAYS
Chinese school, and became more interested in
studying that language. At that time the prince
became seriously ill and died. It caused me a
great disappointment and sorrow. His younger
brother succeeded him and became our prince.
But he was far inferior to his deceased brother
in every respect. He cared nothing for impro-
ving the condition of his retainers. All the affairs
of the prince's court assumed a different aspect.
He found his enjoyment chiefly in eating and
drinking. He often listened to his favorite
mistress for promoting or rejecting his officers.
I felt then all my hope for carrying out my study
was gone. However, I was not idle in securing
my purpose, and endeavored to keep up my
study as much as I could. My father became
doubtful whether it would be wise to pursue my
study any further. He was afraid of my being
influenced by those mannerless and careless fel-
lows he often found among our students. Beside
that, he was still cherishing a hope that I should
become his successor in the penmanship school.
So he began to interfere with my study and to
urge me to assist him in teaching the penman-
ship. But I was very unwilling to do so.
31 MY YOUNGER DAYS
In those days it was almost next to an impossi-
bility for a son to disobey his father's command.
So I was bound to obey him. The only hope I
had for obtaining my aim was to secure some
favor from my Chinese teacher, and also from
that gentleman in Annaka whom I have previ-
ously mentioned. While I was seriously contem-
plating on the subject, those friends were taken
away from me by death, one after another, with-
in a few months. How disheartened I was then!
I often exclaimed within myself: "My prince is
gone, and my teacher also. The friend at
Annaka, on whom I hung the last cord of my
hope, is also taken away from me. What unfortu-
nate fellow I must be! Who will help me to
continue my study? What will be my fate in
future?" I felt I was left almost alone and help-
less in the world.
Attending the Prince
When I completed my fifteenth year I was
obliged to commence my service to the prince.
It was my duty to sit in the little office
connected with the front entrance
hall of his palace. There were always more than
half a dozen persons in the office. Our business
was to watch the hall, and whenever the prince
MY YOUNGER DAYS 32
went out or came home. we were all obliged to
sit on one side of the hall in a row and bow our-
selves profoundly before him upon the matted
floor. Beside that, we used to keep some records
for him. But our chief occupation was to spend
our time in silly gossip, talking, laughing, and
frequent tea-drinkings. I found it almost unbear-
able to keep company with them. Yet there was
no way for me to excuse myself from its partici-
pation. Furthermore, I was much prevented by
them from studying in the office. Early in the
spring of my seventeenth year, my prince was
ordered by the Shogun to go to Osaka to keep
watch of that great castle built by our renowned
hero Hideyoshi, who conquered and governed the
whole empire of Japan about three centuries ago.
Of course the prince took with him a number of
his retainers. My father was one of them. He
followed the prince as his scribe, and left his
school in my charge. I was also ordered by the
prince to be a scribe in his court at Yedo during
his absence. While I was so much pressed by a
double duty, both at home and in the prince's court,
a fresh desire for knowing the European nations
came to me, and I found it almost irresistible.
33 MY YOUNGER DAYS
Dutch was then the only European language we
could study. I found a good teacher in that
language within a mile from my home. I used
to go there whenever I could spare a little time,
although I was much tied up to many duties.
But when I became intensely interested in the
new study. I began to neglect my duties, so
inexcusably imposed upon me by my prince and
my father. I often absented myself from the
office, although I was required to be there. I
did this purposely because I wished to be dis-,
charged from my service on account of my
disregarding the prince's order But as there
was no one to take my place there, I was still
kept in the office. My frequent absences gave
the superior officer, who kept the prince's palace
during his absence, great inconvenience. He
found much writing to be done, but on coming
to the office he did not find me there, and often
scolded me. But I did not mind it. I simply
requested him to discharge me from the service
at once. Finding me beyond his control, he often
summoned my grandfather to his office and
scolded him also. So my grandfather began to
meddle with my study. But I remained as
34 MY YOUNGER DAYS
obstinate as ever, and kept up my study even in
this trying way. When my father returned he
resumed his service, and I was released. Still I
could not get rid of the service of the prince
altogether.
Just about that time the country was in
fearful commotion. Assassination and bloodshed
occurred here and there almost everyday. Being
frightened by this, my coward prince selected a
number of the younger persons from his retainers
to be his lifeguards. Unfortunately, I was chosen
to be one of them. Whenever he went out of
his palace I was obliged to follow him. Early in
the spring of my eighteenth year I followed him
as far as Annaka. Of course he was carried in
a kago, and we, his lifeguards, were obliged to
follow him on foot. It required in me no small
amount of patience to be forced into such a
servitude. When I came home from Annaka I
was utterly disgusted with the prince's service.
I often planned to run away from home in order
to get rid of it, but I was not bold enough to do
so. I was too fondly tied up to my home, and
was much afraid of causing great sorrow and
disgrace to my parents and grandfather. While
35 MY YOUNGER DAYS
I was in this hard fix I was not discouraged with
the hopeless outlook, and attempted to secure a
favor from one of the prince's elder men.
Formidable Dutch Warships
Through his influence I was partially exempted
from the prince's service. How glad I was then
when I found more leisure hours
to study. At that time I had
just acquired Dutch enough to read a simple
treatise on physics and astronomy. But I
was utterly ignorant of mathematics, and the
simplest calculations in this treatise were beyond
my comprehension. So I was prompted to go
to the Shogun's naval school just established
in Yedo, and take lessons in arithmetic from
its very rudiments. I believe it was then the
only school in the country where I could find
efficient teachers in mathematics. There I had
chances to hear from my teachers of the
foreign steamers, and sometimes I wished to see
them. One day I happened to walk on the shore
of Yedo Bay and caught a sight of the Dutch
warships lying at anchor. They looked so stately
and formidable! When I compared those digni-
fied sea-queens side by side with our clumsy and
disproportioned junks, nothing further was needed
36 MY YOUNGER DAYS
to convince me that the foreigners who built such
warships must be more intelligent and a superior
people to the Japanese. It seemed to me a
mighty object lesson to rouse up my ambition to
cry out for the general improvement and renova-
tion of my country. I supposed the first thing
to be done would be to create a naval force, and
also to build vessels of the foreign style to faci-
litate the foreign commerce. This new idea
prompted me to pursue the study of navigation.
In a course of two years' hard work I fin-
ished my arithmetic, algebra, and geometry, and
also acquired the rudiments of theoretical naviga-
tion; but my study was sadly interrupted by
severe measles. My illness was a very serious
one, and utterly enfeebled me. I was obliged to
stay away from my school nearly three months.
While I was yet feeble I began to study algebra
in a Dutch book, and got through with it before
I found myself strong enough to go out of doors.
But this apparent little gain caused me great loss.
Weak eyes, headaches, and sleeplessness came
upon me one after another and I was obliged to
give up my studies for some time
MY YOUNGER DAYS 37
| |
|
The Kaifumaru
| |
First Voyage on a Steamer
In the winter of the same year I had the
first opportunity to take a voyage
to Tamashima, a seaport a little
beyond Okayama. The schooner
belonged to the prince of Matsuyama,1 who
was closely related to my prince. On that
account he gave me a free passage. It took us
a little over three months to come back to Yedo.
I enjoyed it exceedingly, and was also benefited
by staying away so far from my prince's square
inclosure where I spent all my younger days, and
where I supposed that the heavens were but a
little square patch. It was my first experience in
mingling with different people and seeing differ-
ent places. Evidently the sphere of my mental
horizon was much widened by that voyage. I
visited the city of Osaka, where I had my first
opportunity to taste beef. Being filled by a fresh
idea for freedom, I planned to get rid of my
obligation to my prince by connecting myself
with the Shogun's government. The way to
secure it was to be employed by him as a navi-
gator, but that plan was soon banished from my
thought when I found out something of the life
1) Takahashi in Okayama Prefecture
MY YOUNGER DAYS 38
of those employed .in the Shogun's navy. Their
base and licentious life shocked me. I did not
like to mingle with them. So I found no way to
sever myself from my prince. Still my strong
desire to obtain freedom became a real incentive
to disregard and disobey him. I refused his
order decidedly when I was compelled to take
up a musket and prepare myself to be his
soldier.
Finding the Heavenly Father
The war-cloud was then becoming intensely
thick in the country. My prince was obliged to
stand up for the cause
of the unfortunate Shogun
against the rising imperial party. As for me, I
had full sympathy with the latter party; and
often wished to join them. Yet a tender cord
which bound me to my parents and grandfather
tied me also to their prince. This was to me
another severe trial. I became extremely nervous
and irritable, and I might have been utterly
ruined if I had not found a consoling friend to
rescue me from this trouble. He often invited
me to his house to study Dutch with him, and
as he was further advanced in the study he was
a great help to me. He lent me a number of
39 MY YOUNGER DAYS
books to read, and among them I found a Japanese
translation n of the story of Robinson Crusoe. It
created in me a desire to visit foreign lands.
Being pleased with it, I showed it to my grand-
father and urged him to read it. When he read
it through, he gave me a solemn warning, saying,
"Young man, don't read such a book; I fear it
will mislead you." At that time I received per-
mission from my prince to go to a private school,
and stayed there a part of the time when he did
not require my service. Some time afterwards
my friend lent me a number of Chinese books.
One of them was a historical geography of the
United States written by the Rev. Dr. Bridgman
of the North China mission. Another was a
brief history of the world written by an English
missionary in China. Another was Dr. William-
son's little magazine; and what excited most
my curiosity were a few Christian books, pub-
lished either at Shanghai or Hongkong. I read
them with close attention. I was partly a skeptic,
and partly struck with reverential awe. I became
acquainted with the name of the Creator through
those Dutch books I studied before, but it never
came home so dear to my heart as when I read
MY YOUNGER DAYS 40
the simple story of God's creation of the universe
on those pages of a brief Chinese Bible History.
I found out that the world we live upon was
created by His unseen hand, and not by a mere
chance. I discovered in the same History his
other name was the "Heavenly Father," which
created in me more reverence towards Him,
because I thought He was more to me than a
mere Creator of the world. All these books
helped me to behold a being somewhat dimly yet
in my mental eye, who was so blindly concealed
from me during the first two decades of my
life.
Changing of Thought, Making of Decision
Not being able to see any foreign missionaries
then, I could not obtain any explanations on many
points, and I wished at
once to visit a land where
the gospel is freely taught, and from whence
teachers of God's words were sent out. Having
recognized God as my Heavenly Father, I felt I
was no longer inseparably bound to my parents.
I discovered for the first time that the doctrines
of Confucius on the filial relation were too narrow
and fallacious. I said then: "I am no more
my parents', but my God's." A strong cord
MY YOUNGER DAYS 41
which had held me strongly to my father's home
was broken asunder at that moment. I felt then
that. I must take my own course. I must serve
my Heavenly Father more than my earthly par-
ents. This new idea gave me courage to make
a decision to forsake my prince, and also to leave
my home and my country temporarily.
Planning to Visit Hakodate
While I was walking on the streets of Yedo
one morning, I met quite unexpectedly a friend
whose acquaintance I formed
during my voyage to Tama-
shima. He informed me that the prince's
schooner was going to leave Yedo for Hakodate
within three days. Knowing that I was still inter-
ested in navigation, he asked me whether I would
take a short voyage to Hakodate with her. Possibly.
it was a mere complimentary question on his part,
but to me it was a question of no small interest.
He went off on his way quickly, and I my own,
without saying anything definite on the subject.
But soon after the separation a thought flashed
on me like lightning, that I must not miss this
opportunity for going to Hakodate, and from
thence attempt an escape to a foreign land.
Then the question was how to avail myself of
42 MY YOUNGER DAYS
this opportunity. I knew almost too well that my
prince would not give me permission to go so
far as Hakodate. I thought then the most feasible
way to execute my object would be to secure the
favor of the Prince Matsuyama, the owner of the
schooner, before I said anything either to my
prince or to my parents. Without coming home
I went directly to a confidential counselor of the
prince to ask him to secure the prince's favor
for me, to give me a free passage to Hakodate
in his vessel. He was much pleased to see me,
as I was previously acquainted with him, and
presented the case at once to his prince in my
behalf. The matter was arranged with the prince
that he should hire me to be employed in his
vessel on her passage to Hakodate, and should
ask my prince's leave that I might go. The
prince complied with all my requests with great
pleasure, and sent a messenger to my prince to
obtain leave for me from his service. The mes-
senger was particularly instructed by him to
obtain a favorable reply without the least delay.
Of course my prince could not refuse this special
request of Prince Matsuyama, and gave a favor-
able answer to the messenger at once. This
MY YOUNGER DAYS 43
settled my case fairly, and no one could prevent
my departure for Hakodate.
A Farewell Dinner
When the news reached my father he was
utterly confounded; and although he was quite
unwilling to let me go, he could not
change the order of the prince. It
surprised every one of my neighbors and acquaint-
ances. There was no time to be lost for my
preparation; but through the great diligence of
my mother and my sisters, I was quite well
equipped to start at once. Two days after the
matter was decided that I must depart from
home, my grandfather provided a generous din-
ner, and invited our neighbors and friends to
partake of it with us. When we were all seated
in a circle in our parlor, having one of those
low dinner-tables before each one, and were ready
to commence eating, he passed around a cup of
cold water for us to sip from, after the manner
of our solemn departing ceremony, generally
performed when we expect no fair chance of
seeing each other again. What a trying hour it
was to my inexperienced heart! For every one
who was present wept, and none raised up their
face except myself and my grandfather. He
44 MY YOCTNGER DAYS
skillfully concealed his tears and appeared unusu-
ally cheerful; and I kept myself very brave.
When the dinner was over my grandfather said
to me: " My dear child, your future will be like
seeking a pleasure on a mountain of full blossoms.
Go your way without a least fear." This unex-
pected parting from his iips gave me a full
courage to start from home like a man. Then
I bowed to him, to my parents, my sisters and
all who were invited there, and left my dear
home which I did not expect to see again before
I should see the wide world.
Pere Nicholi
My younger brother followed me on the street
of Yedo to a considerable distance. When 1 looked
back to speak to him I found him sadly weeping.
Then said I: "Why do you weep, my brother?
You are like a girl. You had better go home
from here." So I sent him back, giving him my
parting instruction to be ever diligent in his study
(This was my last sight of my brother. He died
in the year 1871, three years before I returned
to my home.) Early the following morning we
sailed out of Yedo bay, leaving that
great city beyond the horizon glancing
now and then at the snow-capped, beautiful
MY YOUNGER DAYS 45
Fusiyama1 in the distance. We stopped here an
there on the way to Hakodate for the merchandise
of the prince. At the entrance of our harbor we
might have experienced a sad shipwreck, being
helplessly carried by the strong tide against a reef
if we had not received kindly help from the shore
to tow us out of danger. It was in the early
part of the spring of 1864 2 when we left Yedo
and within a month we reached Hakodate in
safety. Here I was planning to get access to
some foreigners, that through their favor I might
attempt an escape. Through a friend of mine
I was introduced to Pere Nicholi, a Russian
priest, to be his teacher of the Japanese language
so that through his influence I might attain my
object
Being far away from home, I became more
careful in my observations; what struck me
most was the corrupt condition of the people. I
thought then, a mere material progress will prove
itself useless so long as their morals are in such
a deplorable state. Japan needs a moral reforma-
tion more than mere material progress and my
1) Mount Fuji
2) 元治元年三月十一日(二十一才の時)
46 MY YOUNGER DAYS
purpose was more strengthened to visit a foreign
land.
| |
|
| |
Planning Flight from Japan
After my being with the Russian priest nearly
a month at his house, I gradually introduced to
him my secret object, and
asked his assistance to carry
it out. I told him then what Japan needs most is
moral reformation, and so far as I am convinced
the reformation must be brought through Christi-
anity. He was much pleased with my talk,
but warned me against such a project as I had
revealed to him. He urged me to stay with him,
and told me he would be glad to give me lessons
on the Bible as well as in English, Being dis-
couraged with his warning, I began to seek
some friends in the foreign concession. The very
first friend I found there was a Japanese clerkl
employed by an English merchant, who showed
me a strangely kind attention at a brief interview.
I liked him very much and asked him the favor
to be received at his office quite often. He told
me he would welcome me at any time when he
was free from business, and, furthermore, he
agreed to teach me English. But after a few
l) Mr. Unokichi Fujiya (冨士屋宇野吉、後の幅士成豊)
MY YOUNGER DAYS 47
interviews with him I revealed to him my long-
cherished plan. He was much pleased with it
and promised me he would keep it in mind.
Having an intense desire to carry out my project,
I assumed the costume of the common citizen,
and tried to keep myself unnoticed when I went
out on the street at Hakodate. I laid aside my
long sword, which was then regarded as a mark
of the samurai class. I also dressed my hair
more simply. It was not more than a week after
my confidential conversation with him, when he
told me I might equip myself at once for leaving
the country. An American captain had given
him a consent to take me as far as China. It
was his plan that, if I got away as far as China,
there might be a better opportunity for me to
find a passage to the United States. How glad
I was then when I was informed of this fair
chance of my seeking something in an unknown
land beyond the sea!
Just at that time Pere Nicholi was absent
from his house for his summer vacation, and had
left it entirely to my charge. Having stayed
there nearly two months, I had formed a number
of acquaintances, some of whom were high officers
MY YOUNGER DAYS 48
of the local government, but to only a few of
them did I reveal my plans. When I was almost
ready to embark in an American vessel, I made
a pretense of being called back to my home,
lest my sudden disappearance from Hakodate
might rouse suspicion in some of the officers that
I was to take refuge in a foreign vessel, and a
government ship would be sent to chase after
me. At this time any one attempting to leave
the country without permission of the govern-
ment, if retaken, suffered death penalty.
While I was making a hasty preparation I
found a little spare hour to get my photograph
taken by a Russian artist, to be sent to my
parents with my farewell letter.1 Thereby I gave
them notice of my departure for a far-off land,
having America in view.
Boarding the Berlin at Risk of Life
At the appointed hour I called on my
Japanese friend at the foreign concession, who
agreed to take me over to the American vessel,
which was ready to sail on the following morn-
l) This letter was not delivered, lest the friend to whose
care it was committed, and the father also, might be subjected
to severe punishment by the government; and three years
elapsed before the father of Neesima heard from his son.
MY YOUNGER DAYS 49
ing for Shanghai. He was there waiting for
me, and gave me a warm
welcome. He made some
hot lemonade for us to drink before we started
together on that midnight adventure, and told
me I must not be nervous about my hazar-
dous risk. But to my remembrance I was
not nervous at all. Before I reached his place
I heard a dog barking in the distance, and
perceived at once that my Japanese shoes
attracted the attention of the animal; so I took
them off on the spot, in order to detect how far
or in what direction that barking creature might
be. When I told my friend where I had left my
shoes, he rushed out in his bare feet and brought
them back to me. Then we went down together
to a wharf where he had ready a small boat.
While we were standing on the wharf we heard
somebody coming, so I hurried to the boat and
laid flat down on the bottom, to make an appear-
ance that I was one of the bundles that contained
a few articles of my own. It proved to be a
watchman, and the chance was he would catch
both of us. But, providentially, he was a coward,
and dared not approach close enough to detect
50 MY YOUNGER DAYS
us. He only saw my friend on the wharf about
to untie the boat, and asked him in a trembling
voice, "Who is here?" "It is I," replied my
friend calmly, and said further that he had neces-
sary business with the captain of an American
vessel which could not be delayed until tomorrow.
My friend was well known to the watchman, who
recognized him at once, and his brief explanation,
spoken in such a quiet and confidential manner
was quite enough to be a passport to let him off
from the wharf even in a midnight hour. As
we rowed away we saw the thousands of lights
on the shore. The people were celebrating a
festival of one of their heathen gods. As the
American vessel was lying quite far from the
shore, it required in us considerable effort to
reach it. The captain was waiting for us, and
we were taken on board the Berlin without the
least delay. Giving me a warm grip of hand, my
friend bade me farewell and rowed to the shore
alone, and I was taken to a store-room of the
cabin and locked up. I went to sleep at once,
and had a splendid night, being aroused by the
brisk steps of sailors overhead in the morning.
I heard also some Japanese talking with the cap-
MY YOUNGER DAYS 51
tain in the cabin,--custom-house officers, come on
board to examine the vessel before she left the
harbor. It was useless for me to rise, because I
I was locked up in my room; so I remained quietly
waiting for the captain's summons.
Shanghai Bound
At that moment all the past events of my
came to my recollection. What troubled me
most was my filial affection to my parents and
grandfather, so touchingly roused up then. How-
ever, it was too late for me to look back, and I
was glad for my success so far. It was no small
undertaking for me to start a new life who had
no experience in hardships, and to launch myself
into the almost boundless ocean to seek some-
thing to satisfy my unquenchable appetite. What
kept up my courage was an idea
that the unseen hand would not fail
to guide me. I had also an idea of risking my
life for a new adventure, and said within myself:
If I fail in my attempt altogether, it may be no
least loss for my country; but if I am permitted
come home after my long exile to yet unknown
lands. I may render some service to my dear
country.
Toward noon the captain unlocked my door
52 MY YOIJNGER DAYS
and called me up on deck. Then the vessel was
quite far off from the harbor, and that beautiful
city Hakodate was almost sunk beyond the
horizon. We were sailing, along the coast and
the blue mountains were more or less within our
sight for twelve days, When we came to leave
the blue peaks of those mountain islands beyond
the expansive horizon, I climbed up into the
rigging to catch their last sight. I felt then some-
what sensitive, but some thoughts of the future
gave me fresh courage, and I looked forward to
China instead of looking homeward. Three days
after I lost sight of our mountain island our
vessel was towed up to Shanghai by a small
tugboat.
Terribly Enraged
Here I must mention my experience on the
voyage. As I was unable to pay my passage, I
agreed with the captain to work for it.
So I commenced my service in the cabin.
Alas! I could not speak a single word in English.
So the captain was kind enough to teach
me the names of the objects found in the cabin.
It was a regular object lesson. He pointed out
an object, speaking its name distinctly that I
might catch it. There was one passenger on
53 MY YOUNGER DAYS
board. I know not whether he was an American
or an Englishman. He also taught me English.
Sometimes he treated me very kindly, and
sometimes very roughly. I was once beaten by
him because I did not understand what he
ordered me to do. Then I was terribly enraged,
and rushed down to my room for my Japanese
sword to revenge myself. When I caught my
sword and was about to dash out of the room,
a thought came to me at once that I must
take a serious consideration before I should take
such an action. So I sat down on my bed and
said within myself: This may be a mere trifling
matter; I may possibly meet still harder trials
hereafter. If I cannot bear this now, how can I
expect to meet a serious one? I felt quite
ashamed of my impatience, and resolved that I
should never resort to my sword for any causes.
Another event took place on the voyage to
China. When I had emptied a dish tub, after
washing dishes, I carelessly threw a tablespoon
overboard. The Chinese steward frightened me
by saying, "The captain will beat you." I
thought it might be a costly silver spoon. Then
I took out all the Japanese money I had, went
54 MY YOUNGER DAYS
to the cabin and confessed to the captain by
making motions with my hands and shoulders,
begging him to take the money for the lost spoon.
To my great surprise he smiled at me and refused
to take it from me. And here I must not fail to
mention the name of the captain who so kindly
offered to take me to China at the risk of losing
his vessel, viz.: Captain William T. Savory, a
citizen of Salem, Mass. At Shanghai I was trans-
ferred to another American ship called Wild
Rover, commanded by Captain Horace S. Taylor,
a native of Chatham, Mass. As Captain Savory
was obliged to go back to Japan in the same
vessel, he requested Captain Taylor to take
charge of me.
On Board the Wild Rover, Off for Boston
| |
|
The Wild Rover
| |
A few days after I came to the ship Wild
Rover I presented my long sword to the captain,
requesting him to take
me to the United States,
And I agreed to work out my passage without pay.
So I began to work in his cabin. Not being able
to call me by my Japanese name, the captain gave
me a "new name," Joe. Hence my American
parents called me Joseph. The ship remained in
Shanghai until the first part of September, then
55 MY YOUNGER DAYS
sailed to Foochoo for lumber, to be brought to
the former port again. Then she went to
Hongkong, and from there to Saigon, where she
took a cargo of rice for Hongkong. While there
I wanted to buy a copy of the Chinese New
Testament, but found that my Japanese money
would not pass there. So I requested the captain
to buy my small sword for eight dollars. Some
time after I obtained that money, the captain
gave me permission to go on shore with the
Chinese steward to get a sight of the city. Then
I had a fine chance to purchase a copy of the
New Testament in a Chinese bookstore. Soon
after the ship unloaded she sailed for Manila to
get a full cargo of hemp for the homeward
voyage. When we were ready to sail out from
the harbor of Manilla there was a report that an
English steamer was lying in wait for American
vessels at the entrance of the harbor. We had
no idea that the civil war in the United States
was over then, and the captain feared that English
boat might do some mischief to the ship. He
busied himself on deck with his spyglass, and
the mates were hurrying down to the magazine
to take out powder and balls to be used for
MY YOUNGER DAYS 56
self-defense. However, we sailed forward towards
the suspicious ship and passed her without the
least disturbance. It was the first of April, 1865,1
when we left Manilla, and it took us just four
months to reach Boston. We did not stop on the
way, as we had plenty of provisions and water.
During the voyage my business was to wait
upon the captain at his meals, to keep the cabin
in order, etc. I often pulled ropes when I was
free from the captain's service. The most enjoy-
able part of the voyage was my daily calculation
of the ship's position with the captain. He was
extremely kind to me, and treated me as if I
were one of his own brothers. He never spoke
any cross words to me. Every one on board
treated me pleasantly. I often wished to go to
the forecastle to see the sailors, but I was not
allowed to do so. The captain warned me to
keep far from them. We enjoyed fine weather
and fair winds throughout the voyage, with the
exception of one or two rough storms. When
just off the Cape of Good Hope we saw a water-
spout; it was the finest sight I ever saw. Then
we caught the trade winds, and sailed daily
1) 慶応元年
57 MY YOUNGER DAYS
thirteen miles an hour on an average.
When we came near Cape Cod we were
informed by a fisherman that the civil war was
ended, and President Lincoln assassinated. As
we slowly entered the harbor of Boston, and saw
the beautiful, busy city, with the gilt dome
within a short distance, the captain ordered the
crew to let go the anchor. Down it went,
and all on board rejoiced that the voyage was
ended.
But to me it was more than mere rejoicing,
for I found soon afterward that the end of the
voyage was going to be my happy destiny.
Through the kindness of the captain I was intro-
duced to the owner of the ship and his wife.1
They became at once my fostering parents, in the
land of my adoption, through whose untiring
care, wise guidance, and constant prayers, I was
permitted to realize some dreams I used to dream
at home so often and so vaguely in my younger-
days.
1) Mr. and Mrs. Alpheus Hardy.
| |
|
Mr. Hardy
| |
| |
|
Mrs. Hardy
| |
| |
|
Hardy's House
| |
(Uploaded by Kenji Kitao)
