This was a statement written by Neesima shortly after he arrived in Boston. He had been unable to explain verbally in English what he wanted to do in the US, and he had been requested to write about his reasons for coming. This statement so impressed the Hardys that they decided to support him while he received an education in the US. They continued to help support his ministry and work in establishing the Doshisha for the rest of his life. Kenji KItao
On October 1lth Mr. Hardy received the following statement: -- "I was born in a house of a prince [Itakura] in Yedo. My father [Neesima Tamiharu] was writing- master of the prince's house and his writer, and my grandfather was an officer of whole,1 the prince's ser- vant. I began to learn Japan, and China too, from six years age, but at eleven years age my mind had changed quite to learn sword-exercise and riding horse. At sixteen years age my desire was deepened to learn China and cast away sword-exercise and other things. But my prince picked me up to write his daily book, although it would not have been my desire. I was obliged to go up his office one another day, and I must teach small boys and girls too, instead my father at home. Therefore I could not get in China school to learn China, but I read every night at home. A day my comrade lent me an atlas of United States of North America, which was written with China letter by some American minister.2 I read it many times, l That is, a steward, in charge of the private servants and attend- ants of the prince, -- pages, carriers, cooks, kago bearers, etc., -- an office of considerable dignity and responsibility. 2 What is here called an "atlas" was a History of the United States written by Dr. Bridgman, of Shanghai, in China. After Dr. Bridg- man's death, his widow visited Dr. Brown, in Yokohama, and left with him a few copies of her husband's history, which were distributed by 4 EARLY LIFE and I was wondered so much as my brain would melted out from my head, picking out President, Building, Free School, Poor House, House of Correction, and machine-working, etc. And I thought that a governor of our country must be as President of the United States. And I murmured myself that. O Governor, of Japan! why you keep down us as a dog or a pig? We are people of Japan. If you govern us you must love us as your children. From that time I wished to learn American knowledge, but alas, I could not get any teacher to learn it. Although I would not like to learn Holland, I was obliged to learn it because many of my countrymen understood to read it. Every one another day I went to my master's house to learn it. "Some day I had been in the prince's office and I got none to write at all. Therefore I ran out from the office and went to my master's house. By and by my prince stepped into the office, wanting to see me; but he saw nobody there, and he stayed me until I came back into. When he saw me he beated me. 'Why you run out from the office? I would not allowed you to run out from there.' After ten days I ran out from there again, but he would not know about it. But alas! in the next time he found out again I ran out from the office, and he beated me. 'Why you run out from here?' Then I answered to him that 'I wished to learn foreign knowledge, and I hope to un- derstand it very quickly; therefore, though I know I must stay here, reverence your law, my soul went to my master's house to learn it, and my body was obliged to go thither too.' Then he said to me very kindly Dr. Brown. It was doubtless one of these copies which fell into Nee- sima's hands. 5 HUNGER FOR KNOWLEDGE that 'you can write Japan very well, and you can earn yourself enough with it. If you don't run out from there any more I will give you more wages. With what reason will you like foreign knowledge? Per- haps it will mistake yourself.' I said: 'Why will it mistake myself? I guess every one must take some knowledge. If a man has not any knowledge I will worth him as a dog or a pig.' Then he laughed very hard about it, and said to me: 'You are stable boy.' Beside him, my grandfather, parents, sisters, friends, and neighbors, beated or laughed for me about it. But I never took care to them, and held my stableness very fast. After few months I got many business in the office, and I could not get out from there. Ah! it made me many musings in my head and made me some sickness too. I would not like to see anybody, and would not desire to go out to play myself, but I liked only to stay in a peaceful room. I knew it is bad sickness, therefore I went to some doctor, hoping to get some medicine. After he stay my sickness many times, he told me, 'Your sickness comes from your mind, therefore you must try to destroy your warm mind, and must take walk for healthfulness of your body, and it would be more better than many medicines.' The prince gave me many times to feed my weakness, and my father gave me some money to play myself. But I went every day to my master's house to learn Holland. I read up Holland grammar, spending many times, and I took a small book of na- ture, and I pleased to read it so much as I would say that this book would be more better than doctors' medicine to my sickness. When my sickness got bet- ter, after few months, the prince picked me up again to write his daily book, and I must stay in the office 6 EARLY LIFE every day against his order. Ah! I could not get out from there to learn Holland, but I got many times to read book at night, and I read through the book of nature at home, taking a dictionary of Japan and Holland. Alas! the study of night-time caused me weak eyes, and I was obliged to stop it too. After ten weeks my weak eyes recovered entirely, and I began to read the book again; but I could not under- stand some reasonable accounts in it. Therefore I purposed to learn arithmetic. But I had not any times to learn it. A day I asked to the prince, 'Please get me more time to take knowledge.' Then he let me get out from there thrice a week, although it was not enough to me. I went to some arithmetical school to learn it, and understood addition, subtraction, mul- tiplication, division, fractions, interest, etc. Then I took the book again, and understood some reasonable accounts in it. "Some day I went to the seaside of Yedo, hoping to see the view of the sea. I saw largest man-of-war of Dutch lying there, and it seemed to me as a castle or a battery, and I thought too she would be strong to fight with enemy. While I look upon her one re- flection came down upon my head: that we must open navy, because the country is surrounded with water, and if foreigners fight to my country, we must fight with them at sea. But I made other reflection too: that since foreigners trade, price of everythings got high, the country got poorer than before, because the coun- trymen don't understand to do trade with the foreign ers. Therefore we must go to foreign countries, we must know to do trade, and we must learn foreign knowledge. But the government's law neglected all my thoughts, and I cried out myself: Why govern- FIRST READING OF BIBLE. 7 ment? Why not let us be freely? Why let us be as a bird in a cage or a rat in a bag? Nay! We must cast away such a savage government, and we must pick out a president as the United States of America. But alas! such things would have been out of my power. "From that time I went to a marine school of gov- ernment to learn navigation a week thrice. After many months I understood little algebra, little geom- etry, to keep log, and to take sun, to find latitude. Ah! the study of night-time caused me weak eyes again, and I could not study at all during the time of one year and a half which would not come again in my life. After my eyes got better I was obliged to go in the prince's office. That time was very hot and sickly season of Yedo. A day the sun shined very hard, and in the evening it had rained very heavy. Then I felt cold and chilled myself. The next morning my head began to ache, and my body was so hot as a fire would burn within me. I could eat nothing, but drank cold water only. After two days measles raised up all over my body. When the measles got better my eyes began to spoil, and I played and spent many times very vainly. A day I visited my friend, and I found out small Holy Bible in his library that was written by some American minister with China lan- guage, and had shown only the most remarkable events of it. 1 lend it from him and read it at night, because I was afraid the savage country's law, which if I read the Bible, government will cross whole my family. I understood God at first, and he separated the earth from firmament, made light upon the earth, made grass, trees, creatures, fowls, fishes. And he created a man in his own image, and made up a woman, cut- 8 EARLY LIFE ting a man's side bone. After he made up all things of universe, he took a rest. That day we must call Sunday or Sabbath day. I understood that Jesus Christ was Son of Holy Ghost, and he was crossed for the sins of all the world; therefore we must call him our Saviour. Then I put down the book and look around me, saying that: Who made me? My parents? No, God. Who made my table? A carpen- ter? No, my God. God let trees grow upon the earth, and although God let a carpenter made up my table, it indeed came from some tree. Then I must be thankful to God, I must believe him, and I must be upright against him. From that time my mind was fulfilled to read English Bible, and purposed to go to Hakodate to get English or American teacher of it. Therefore I asked of my prince and parents to go thither. But they had not allowed to me for it, and were alarmed at it. But my stableness would not destroy by their expostulations, and I kept such thoughts, praying only to God: Please! let me reach my aim. "And I began to read English from some Japanese teacher. A day I walked some street of Yedo, and suddenly met a skipper of a schooner, who knew me well and love me too. I asked to him, 'When your vessel going?' He answered, 'She will bound to Hakodate within three days.' I told him, 'I got warm heart to go thither. If you please, let me go thither.' He said me: 'I will take you to go thither, but perhaps your prince and your parents will not allow it to you. You must ask first to them.' After two days I took up some money, little clothing, and little books, and left quite my home, not thinking that if this money was gone how I would eat, or dress my- 9ARRIVES IN BOSTON 9 self, but only casting myself into the providence of God. In the next morning I went on board of the schooner that would bound to Hakodate. When I came to Hakodate I searched some teacher of Eng- lish, but I could not find him with many ways. There- fore my head was quite changed to run away from the country. But one thought stayed me, that my grand- father and parents would sorrow about it, and it bal- nced my mind little while. But after one reflection came upon my head, that although my parents made and fed me, I belong indeed to Heavenly Father; therefore I must believe him, I must be thankful to him, and I must run into his ways. Then I began to search some vessel to get out from the country. "After many labor I got into an American vessel which would bound to Shanghai. After I came in Shanghai river, I joined to the ship Wild Rover, and had been in the China coasts with her about eight months; with the passage of four months, I come in Boston harbor by the kindness of God. When I saw first the ship's captain, H. S. Taylor, I begged to him if I get to America: 'Please! let me go to school and take good education; therefore I shall work on the board as well as I can, and I will not take any wages from you;' and he promised me if I get home he will send me to a school and let me work on the board as his servant. Although he not give me any money, he bought for me any clothing, cap, shoes, and any other thing. At sea he taught me to keep log, to find out latitude and longitude. When I come here the cap- tain let me stay on the board long while, and I had been with rough and godless men who kept the ship, and every one on the wharf frightened me. No one on the shore will relieve you, because since the war the 10 EARLY HFE. price of everythings got high. Ah! you must go to sea again. I thought too I must work pretty well for my eating and dressing, and I could not get in any school before I could earn any money to pay to a school. When such thoughts pressed my brain I could not work very well, I could not read book very cheerfully, and only looked around myself long while as a lunatic. Every night after I went to bed I prayed to the God: Please! don't cast away me into miserable condition. Please! let me reach my great aim! Now I know the ship's owner, Mr. Hardy, may send me to a school, and he will pay all my expenses. When I heard first these things from my captain my eyes were fulfilled with many tears, because I was very thankful to him, and I thought too: God will not forsake me."
To this remarkable statement was due the begin- ning of that interest which Mr. and Mrs. Hardy felt in Neesima, an interest which deepened with the years, and which subsequent events amply justified. During the voyage from Japan, Captain Taylor had told Neesima that the owner of the ship might find him some employment in Boston, and possibly provide for his education. In this hope, but perplexed by the difficulty of pursuing his studies while earning his living, Neesima had written the following on some scraps of paper which he confided to the captain be- fore reaching Boston:-- "I must tell you that I am most concerned for it that I will not reach my great aim, because I made such thoughts as hereafter:-- "Though the ship's owner will be very kindly to me, perhaps he will not send me to school so long as I may reach my great aim, because he will spend his HIS GREAT AIM. 11 moneys very vainly for me, and I guess he will spend least twenty dollars a month for my eating, dressing, useful things of my study; and if he spend so much moneys for me, he will give me some great work to do. I must work almost all day. Although I will not loathe such work, perhaps it will hindered good time of my study. If I not understand good know- ledge I may not come back to Japan to see my prince, family, friends, because of my shameful condition, and they will worth me as a dog or a cat because I left home very wickedly, hoping to get some know- ledge. "I am concerned about it as much as my brain would melted out, and when such musings fell on my head I could not read book at all, I would not do anything very cheerfully, and I looked around myself long time as a lunatic, because it confused my mind very much. But I know not yet will I take what course of my life, and I know not too any trade to earn myself. Alas! I am poor and foolish. I have no one around me to relieve me except you. Then I wish heartily to you that please let me direct into some good way which I may reach my aim. If you let me reach my aim I will never forget your kindness and virtuousness. "Although I will go down behind a grave, my soul will go to heaven to tell to God about it and let him bless you with the truth of God. "Please let me hear that Mr. Hardy will let me go to what kind of school, and I wish that he gave me remainder of his table for my eating, old one of his clothing for my dressing, ink, pen, paper, pencil for using of my study." The above was not seen by Mr. Hardy at the time, 12 EARLY LIFE but was sent to him seventeen years later by the widow of Captain Taylor. On learning that Mr. Hardy had decided to send him to school, Neesima wrote him the following letter: I am very thankful to you. You relief me, but I can't show to you my thankfulness with my words. But I at all times bless to God for you with this prayer: O God! if thou hast eyes, look upon me. O God! if thou hast ears, hear my prayer. Let me be civil- ized with Bible. O Lord! thou send thy Spirit upon my Hardy, and let him relief me from sad condi- tion. O Lord! please! set thy eyes upon my Hardy, and keep out him from illness and temptation. Your obedient servant, JOSEPH NEESIMA.
(Source: Hardy, Arthur Sherburne. (1891). Life and letters of Joseph Hardy Neesima. Boston: Houghton Mifflin and Company. Reprinted 1980 by Doshisha University Press, Kyoto, Japan.)